Our life is kind of like a game. There's obstacles along the way and if you die, it's game over. Many people take life for granted, and other people think they don't belong. Sometimes, we do things that can jeopardize our lives. Like this quote I saw, it says, "You can't live life without error, because life is error." Even if life is unfair sometimes, we learn to get through it to the very end. In "A Coney Island Life" by James L. Weil, he helps people to understand to "live life to the fullest," that life is precious, and you never know when it'll be taken away from you.
"Never allow waiting to become a habit. Live your dreams and take risks. Life is happening now." In the poem, Weil writes, "And seen my helium hopes break skyward without me," and it reminds me of the dreams you have, but they don't come true, so you just leave it behind. It also made me think of when someone asks you what you want to be when you grow older when at the time you were a little kid, and you tell them something that's a bit unrealistic so it doesn't come true. Also, when he wrote, "Now my arms filled with dolls I threw so much for" in the carnival sense, it means that the games are really simple, but it's actually really hard to succeed with. It's almost kind of like a rip off in a way. That's what life is kinda like. It's unfair, but you just try to push through it all. Even though some things make you wanna give up, there's always a happy ending when you succeed.
"Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant." When Weil writes, "I take perhaps my last ride on this planet-carousel," it means that he feels like his life might be taken away at this time, so he's trying to do all that he can to have fun with his life. I also felt that he was trying to say that you won't know when your next opportunity will be to accomplish something until the time comes. He also states, "How many more times round I have to catch that brass-ring sun before the game is up." When he stated this, I figured it meant that he's wondering how much longer he has on planet Earth until he passes away. Like I said before, he's trying to do everything he can before he passes away.
Throughout this poem, the author tries to replicate what it feels when someone is so close to their point in life, that they want to make the most of it. This poem written through metaphors and similes, he makes it relate to the success, the obstacles, and limitations life has to offer. Live each day as if your life had just begun, because life is short and you only get one chance out of it. If you want something you've never had, then you've got to do something you've never done. Enjoy the little things in life. Because one day, you'll look back, and you'll realize they were the big things. It helps you learn to start living your life fearlessly.
I think that your purpose or the essay is a bit incorrect. In your writing you keep mentioning the words " made me think." When the purpose of the essay is supposed to be how the poem supports your thesis, I think you are giving more of a more of an opinion. Do you would need to lessen the use of "think". Additionally for the quotes in the beginning of the body paragraphs, I don't think that it isn't really relevant for this kind of work. There is also a repitition of the word "I". But good work
ReplyDeleteOverall great essay. I really liked the way you backed up your evidence and you had good reasoning. Although, I feel that you should work on your concluding sentences because I didn't think that it was that effective. You should relate it to your topic sentences because it seems more random.
ReplyDeleteOverall great essay. I really liked the way you backed up your evidence and you had good reasoning. Although, I feel that you should work on your concluding sentences because I didn't think that it was that effective. You should relate it to your topic sentences because it seems more random.
ReplyDeletePLEASE DO NOT USE "I" IN YOUR WRITING, WE KNOW ITS YOU WRITING DO NOT NEED TO STATE IT. ALSO DO NOT USE QUOTES FROM OTHER PLACES. IN YOUR INTRODUCTION YOU ARE MISSING A SHORT SYNOPSIS OF THE POEM SO WE DON'T WHAT THE POEM IS ABOUT AT ALL. IN YOUR BODY PARAGRAPHS YOU ARE MISSING TOPIC SENTENCES, YOU CAN'T START WITH A QUOTE, YOU LEAVE THE READER LOST. YOU ALSO NEED TO DISCUSS THE METAPHOR A BIT MORE, WE STILL HAVE NO IDEA THAT THE AUTHOR IS COMPARING LIFE TO CONEY ISLAND BECAUSE YOU NEVER DISCUSS IT. AS(2+)
ReplyDelete